So I was asked the other day why it is that I never miss work. “How are you never out sick?” Coincidentally, it was asked by someone that is out of work A LOT, but that is sort of not the point. My answer was that I have to do my job, and in my office now there isn’t anyone else that can do what I do (caption and especially not interpret) so what choice do I have? I come to work, even when I’m sick. Though I will say that days like today really do test that theory.
A series of events kicked off today that led me almost to run my mouth to the point that I can’t take it back, and now I am stuck in a seemingly endless self-assessment loop that is led by my (as of yet undiagnosed) anxiety mind so you can just imagine what a trip to the seaside THAT is turning out to be. Ugh.
It started off with a rant (from me) about people that work in higher ed that seem to only be in it so that they can host events and attend conferences and present on VERY IMPORTANT TOPICS rather than to focus on the students that we are here to serve. That’s a big pet peeve of mine in the field of disability/accessibility services, and it is a struggle with myownself not to call those people out on a daily basis. Listservs and conferences are important, but they are not the real life day to day experience of students with disabilities. Some grounding is needed.
The day progressed until we ran into the second in the series of unfortunate events: a discussion about the exercise of 1st Amendment Rights, the perceived (and often real) persecution of people in specific minority groups both here at my institution and in the United States as a whole, and the use of one’s public figure status to speak out against injustice. In case you’re keeping score, the answer is that to do that is inappropriate.
“So, you’re saying that a person that is in a minority group should not aspire to higher level public office in order to have that platform to speak out against social injustice?”
At that point, I was done, or so I thought. I started thinking…well, overthinking if I’m honest, about interpreting the national anthem. Opened up a firestorm on my Facebook wall because in all that overthinking I didn’t think it through and got my feelings hurt.
I think I’m done. Or else I just have nothing left. Maybe I just need to go to my room.