I discovered something yesterday. I’m old. I am an old woman. I’m a cranky, set in her ways, can’t stay up late without serious repercussions to her mental health Old Woman.
Yesterday I went to visit my sister and her husband. I was supposed to be taking a friend of ours with me to visit, but he never responded to me about when/where to meet. A week, I’m telling you, is too long to go without so much as a short “I’m busy” message when you are planning a trip. The icing on that cake was checking the messages I’d sent (via message board we both belong to because he NEVER checks his email) yesterday before leaving to find all of them still sitting comfortably in my outbox. Yeesh.
So, the puppers and I struck out alone yesterday to go see Dave and Susan. Dave had surgery on his shoulder on Tuesday, and can’t move it for…2 weeks I think. He’s in a sling, and had a nerve block until about 5am yesterday morning. I just can’t even imagine…the worst thing that has ever been done to me at the hands of a doctor would be the staph infection I had on my leg in conjunction with a spider bite…had to be “removed” which is doctor-speak for “dug out.” Who knew they made post-holers that small, or that my mother could turn that many shades of nauseous green? Anyway…
So we went, and had a good time hanging out with Dave and Susan. Dave is in remarkable spirits considering the pain he is obviously in most of the time. He does get cranky, and I think that’s a “man-trying-to-deal-with-pain” issue. But we chatted and got my sister set up with an EQ character of her very own to play (yes, I am spreading the addiction…fear me!)…and then turned on the Grammy awards to watch.
Now I knew I was old before this, but I think last night was just the clarifying moment that drove the point home. Susan went to Dave’s church to cover a Bible study for him (though the heathen in me must admit that having someone lead a Bible study under the influence of “Elvis Presley’s White M&Ms” would have been amusing…)and Dave and I were left to watch the Grammys.
Me: “Yikes on the dress choice, girly looks like she’s pregnant!”
Dave: “She is pregnant.”
Me: “Oh…well, her hair kinda looks like someone pulled it too tight.”
Dave: Grunting noise that almost sounded like a snore, but he had just passed M&M refill time…
Me: “Now there were only two people in that entire category that I even recognized, Missy Elliot and Eminem. What does that say about me?”
Dave: “I really like Kayne West, his song…” and that’s when I stopped recognizing anything he said…and then it hit me…
Me: “Kayne West, is he the one with the thing and Mike Myers and stopping the tape?”
Dave (miraculously understanding my moment of near speaking in tongues): “Yes, Nancy, the one that made the provocative comments during the Hurricane Katrina benefit.”
Me: “What is with those gloves? It’s not cold in there. And the sunglasses, do you really think he can see the audience with those on?”
Dave: “Man, you ARE old.”
I’d like pause here to point out that Dave is only NINE MONTHS younger than I am.
Susan’s Bible study coverage lead to her visiting parishioners that were in the hospital due to a car accident and then heading back home around 10pm. At 10:15pm I was standing behind her showing her how to play EQ, wide awake. At 10:30 I was in the car, sending Dave a BB message to remind him Drawn Together was on Comedy Central in case he was still wound up in the glamour and glitz and bad hairstyles and grubby jeans extravaganza known as the Grammy Awards. At 11pm I was cruising through Gwinnett County, finishing my bottle of water and thinking that I was worried about leaving late for nothing, I’d done this plenty of times in my YOUNG life, I could make it home, no sweat.
11:45pm: Stop at the JeVerson exit (that was for my Mom) and get gas at the QT, lament the emptiness of the water bottle that had kept me awake so far.
12:15am: Pass the Lavonia exit and lament lack of cash and current determination not to stop at a McDonald’s in the middle of the night.
12:16am: Notice that I’ve just referred to the time as the middle of the night and think again how OLD I am.
12:30am: Stop at the Clemson exit and grab a chicken sandwich, fries and a soda at a Wendy’s. Tell myself that Wendy’s doesn’t count as fast food because it’s healthier than McDonald’s.
1am Turn off the highway onto Pleasantburg Drive to head home.
1:15am Pull into the driveway.
2am Actually get in the bed and stare at the ceiling, two greyhounds vying for the 2 inches of space left that they and the three cats and I are not occupying.
And this morning? I officially feel like the underside of a mudflap. But I had a great time yesterday, despite the revelation that I am old…